New Beginnings

Emotional roller-coaster of love and lust


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It is so

it is so

 

It is so; love speaks

in a thousand tongues

There are many ways

to love

I choose your love

 

It is so; happiness

begins within

not with him

I choose happiness with you

 

It is so that life’s choices

will lead you on many paths

smooth and tough

I choose to face it with you

 

It is so; life is change

It is as constant as the air moving

the sun rising

I choose the way you change me

 

It is so; your love woke me up

It wasn’t planned, nor expected…

But so needed

 

It is so; I love you

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


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Return to innocence

Love, Devotion, Feelings, Emotions

Don’t be afraid to be weak

Don’t be too proud to be strong

Just look into your heart my friend

It will be the return to yourself

The return to innocence

If you want then to start to laugh

If you must  then start to cry

Be yourself, don’t hide

Just believe in destiny

Don’t care what people think

Just follow your own way

Don’t give up and use the chance

To return to innocence…

Enigma – Return to innocence

 

I dug out some of my old CD’s this week. I forgot about this song. Now it kind of makes more sense than it did when it first arrived on the scene back in the nineties.

I was so moved by the words. So simple but so true! This is the truth. If there is one thing I want to instill in my child, it is to never ever ever care about what other people think of you. I wasted so much of my life worrying about other people and what they thought of me. So much time. I was too scared to speak my mind so many times. There is a way to speak your mind that is not disrespectful, but  the only way to stand firmly on your own two feet. I went about it in the wrong way. I would have probably not even been in those situations,  if only I believed in myself.

You can always return to innocence. You have never been too damaged, too unworthy, too ugly, to renew yourself. I found a way back.  From rape, from embarrassment, from great disappointment,  from failure, from abuse. I found my way back.

 

 

 


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Leaf me alone

why do I fall

 

One leaf many leaves

Does one leaf maketh a tree?

He turned right, when he left

Or did he turn left?

He leaves her standing

Why do leaves fall?

Leaving the tree behind

 

But the tree can not run

It stands still

left to make

more leaves… or is it

rights?

For not one leaf

maketh the tree,

what it is.

 

What is it?

A strong, beautiful, breathing, living, wonder

 

 

 


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Parking ticket…booo

If there is one thing I hate the most in this world, it is injustice. Nothing gets my back up like it. When I see people being taken advantage of, or taken for a ride, it just infuriates me.

I have been going to the same movie theatre for a couple of years now and always park in the same parking area. I have never paid for my parking because when I enter my registration details upon departure, it has always come back with 0.00 to pay. So great was my surprise when I received a parking ticket in April for not paying. I contacted the parking company (all via email – no calls) and explained that I have never had to pay and that I never take a receipt as it’s 0.00 charge. Their only response was to send me a photograph of the parking metre showing that a charge of 2.50 is charged every two hours. I definitely stayed more than 2 hours on each occasion, but it always told me 0.00 to pay. I explained this to no avail. The fine was for 100.00 and it just did my head in that I am expected to pay this amount for a charge that I was told is 0.00. I went back and took photos and this time I kept all my 0.00 receipts.

In principle, I refuse to pay this. I appealed and it was rejected, again the same photo of the charges board, used as evidence. On one visit, as I once again stood staring at the charges board, a couple approached and said they received a fine and they can’t for the life of them understand why, because they have always paid nothing after 18h00.

Today I received a letter from a debt recovery agency…the fine has been increased to 160 and if I don’t pay, I’ll be taken to court.

Why I’m writing all this, I would really like to know if I am being unreasonable? Why when the machine tells me I have 0.00 to pay would I give it money? The logic…there is no logic. Sooooo…I’ll be in court one of these days. A new experience for me, but still part of the adventure that is life. In the meantime, I’m accumulating 0.00 receipts…

🙂


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If you can’t then..

I went out exploring with my kid yesterday and discovered the most beautiful forest, a pond filled with waterlillies and the old ruins of what looked like pretty big estate from centuries ago.
I started thinking how amazing the world can be right under our noses.

How come it took me ten years to discover this place? I believe that we see what we want to see, or better yet, we see what we expect to see. This is how things are missed. We reach points in our lives where we think, this is it, it doesn’t get any better, or I have found what I’m looking for. But today I implore you, rather think, there is more to discover; my little world is small and I haven’t seen the rest of the world. Think big, look for the small, the inconspicuous, the hidden. This is where the adventure begins 🙂

P.S. In my opinion, scenes like this started the impressionist art form.

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Nothing lasts

 

our bodies wasting away
till every step we stray

our minds slowing down
till there’s just a laughing clown

our hearts beating harder
till it becomes larder

our hands holding tight
till we lose our sight

our love blooms like a spring flower
till winter makes us cower

our passion knows no bounds
till it’s killed by the hungry hounds

our lives ebb and flow
till the fires no longer glow

our spirits soar
Nothing can kill it’s roar

our souls are a mystery
therein lies our history
it can’t be changed
it lasts forever